Suits Recap – S9 E5: If The Shoe Fits

In which Mike returns to fight Harvey on a case, Amanda Schull gets to show her comic range, and we learn that role playing can be an expensive hobby, yo.

Louis and Sheila are role-playing a scenario they call Dirty Cinderella, complete with period costumes and British accents, when the $9K (!) glass slipper they’ve bought for this purpose won’t fit on Sheila’s enlarged-by-pregnancy (been there!) foot. This spoils the mood, and leads to Sheila melting down about how she lost out on a 50K donation at work due to pregnancy brain fog.

Louis asks Alex, father of two, for advice on how to handle Sheila’s pregnancy hormone-induced craziness. Alex clearly explains that Louis should listen to Sheila’s ravings and do NOTHING. Instead, Louis goes to Benjamin, the IT guy, and apologizes for when he tried to get him fired. He then bribes Benjamin with bacon to use his mad IT skills to make a 50K donation to Columbia from Louis that appears to be anonymous.

Sheila sees through this ruse immediately and yells at Louis some more. He suggests couple counselling with Stan. A few minutes with Stan’s compassionate demeanour lead Sheila to admit that the closer she comes to giving birth, the less she cares about her job, once her sole reason to live. Louis says he supports her 1000%, whatever she wants to do.

Though the anonymous donation hack backfired, Louis thanks Benjamin anyway, with a 30% wage increase and a promotion to VP. No word on what Faye thinks of that executive decision.

Faye does have thoughts about the return of the Mike. He’s come to town intending to spar with Harvey over a case involving Brick Street Athletics, an athletic apparel company client that Harvey recently handed to Sam.

Mike is representing a pro basketball player who wants to get out of his endorsement contract with Brick Street because the company produces apparel in China using underpaid and overworked labour in appalling factory conditions.

Mike was looking forward to fighting against Harvey on this case, but Sam won’t give it up. She agrees to work with Harvey on it, but his idea of sharing is that he banters with Mike and calls the shots, and she should butt out.

Mike walks around the law firm hugging all his old friends, jokingly insulting Harvey (hahaha – putdowns are so funny) and making meta comments about the crazy stuff Rachel/Duchess Meghan has been up to lately. He also engages in some strategic PR moves like placing newspaper ads accusing the company of bad labour practices, and having the basketball player give post-game interviews in a protest text T-shirt.

Harvey is ready to concede to Mike’s superior stealth tactics this time around, but Sam doesn’t like Mike, who she refers to as Harvey’s fake son, lol, and doesn’t take orders from Harvey. She fabricates evidence to win the case, fights with Harvey about it, and arouses Faye’s suspicions. When Faye tries to get Sam to pin the evidence fabrication on Harvey, she won’t. Faye knows Sam did it herself, and Faye fires her.

Mike hangs around long enough to give Louis some real-life Suits USA merchandise (another meta nod), a onesie for the baby, then he’s off to Houston to film his new astronaut drama series Seattle, to sue more Fortune 500 companies.

Donna takes Katrina and her golden locks under her wing when Katrina admits she hasn’t gotten over Brian. Step 1 of Donna’s get-over-him plan is for Katrina to call him, like a friend would. Katrina cycles through several cringe-worthy (and funnily delivered) message drafts before she settles on reading some legal-sounding formal sentences that she has written out in advance.

Step 2 of Donna’s plan is for Donna & Katrina to go to a bar, use fake names, and flirt with men who will buy them drinks. Katrina and I both think this is a terrible idea. Katrina doesn’t want someone new, she doesn’t even know how to have a romantic relationship. Donna advises her to make a life for herself outside work.

In the 3rd meta reference in this episode, Katrina later tells Donna she has signed up for ballet lessons, because she used to be into ballet. Of course she was, look at that posture. And can Amanda Schull and Dule Hill please dance together before the series ends? Katrina proudly reports that she deleted the phone message Brian sent her in response to hers, without even listening to it. Way to move on, Katrina! But I’m still hoping for Brian’s return. Maybe Jake Epstein can sing while Amanda and Dule dance.

Next week: The gang works to get Samantha back into the firm, and to push Faye out.

Kim Moritsugu is a Toronto novelist and sometime TV show recapper. Her latest novel The Showrunner, available from your favourite bookseller, is a darkly humourous, suspenseful Hollywood-noir about female ambition inside the TV biz that has been called a “sophisticated, compelling, and surprisingly complex drama,” and has been optioned for development as a TV series.

Check out its book trailer here:

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